This Moment: 1:28 P.M. Val & Ann Browning Cancer Center-Utah Hematology Oncology

I have escaped to the serenity garden outside the entrance door. A nurse is sitting behind me in a wheelchair texting her impressions to someone, just as I am. The white noise of the bubbling fountain soothes the undercurrent of emotion I am pushing down. This is not how it ends, is all I can think. A cool breeze stirs the narrow trees and is a relief from the heat. I have my single shot, no whip, mocha latte next to me on the bench. Details are important. He is in Exam Room 3. The nurse behind me is complaining about how the person on the other line answered her call. The doctor told me it would be better if I waited outside while she did the procedure. The sky is nearly cloudless. I cannot keep all the tears inside my eyes any longer.